How Are You?! by Nancy Gauquier
No, really, how are you?
Are you really terrible?
Does anyone really wanna know?
Why do we ask?
If youre on the verge of suicide,
you always say fine.
Cause you know
what youre not supposed to say.
You are not supposed to say:
Well, Im broke, Im tired,
Im allergic to something and I dont know what,
but I fear it might be something unavoidable,
Im so depressed and in debt,
I make the US economy
and the national deficit look good.
Im thinking about suicide
but Im not sure
how to go about it.
Id slit my wrists
but that could be painful.
Id take all my sleeping pills at once,
but what if I get a nightmare
and cant wake up?
Id put my head in the gas oven,
but all I have is a microwave.
I guess I could put my head in the microwave.
But Id have to cut it off first,
cause I cant turn it on
until the door is shut!
That could be painful.
No one wants to hear this.
Or what if you say:
Hey, Im great!
I just won the lottery!
Im so happy,
Ive got a blue chip on my shoulder!
Im so rich,
Im thinking of investing in real estate!
Becoming a slum landlord!
Investing in Microsoft!
And voting Republican!
No one wants to hear that.
Or what if you say:
Life is just a gray blur.
My head is in a fog.
I cant feel a thing.
Im totally turned off.
Im in some kind of deep psychological shock
due to all the greed and selfishness
in this cruel capitalistic society.
I dont have the energy to get a headache.
No one wants to hear it!
Who has the time to listen anymore?
Were all overworked and underpaid.
Im so busy, I dont even know how I am.
People say, how are you,
and I have to stop and think.
I get in touch with my deep inner self
by consulting the Tarot.
If I end up with the devil or death,
I know I really am depressed.
Funny how that works.
But its so easy to get into denial.
I just keep dealing until I get the Sun
or the Moon or the Lovers
technically, thats cheating
but thats life
you just keep dealing.
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