Copyright reserved. Please do not reproduce without consent.
Ssshhhhh!
by Simon Collinson
Have you heard, it's quite absurd,
they’ve got a python working at our library,
it's quite a sight seeing,
it supinely sitting there,
all coiled up and hissy,
the python’s always sloping off,
to some secluded nook,
with a sly smug look.
I find it unnerving as it,
observes all my movements,
intently with its beady eyes,
and that tongue, flicks out,
rasps and ripples,
as it tastes the air,
those long curved teeth,
certainly give you a scare.
The python’s knowledge of authors is not very strong,
neither is it any good at swiping cards,
it's quite useless at logging you into the computers,
and struggles to put the books back on the shelves,
it can’t even answer the phone,
takes forever to make the tea.
and is always losing the toilet key.
How the python got the job is a mystery,
strange no one seems to complain -
well Jean Murrey did,
but she was never seen again.
But the python comes in handy,
when someone raises their voice,
the python goes Sssshhhhh,
and silence soon settles back,
into its cosy serene place.
The library is a lot quieter these days,
and the kids are so well behaved,
at the first sign of trouble the python is sent slithering in,
one sight of the python’s glistening, gaping jaw,
soon has the rowdy reprobates running for the door.
It's the python's tail,
that you’ve got to watch,
keep your eyes on it,
or else with a swish swish swishing,
you’ll be wish wish wishing,
you’d not spent so long,
reading Rudyard Kipling.
There seems to be fewer kids using the library these days,
for some reason the python,
looks larger and fatter,
and happier too, you should see,
the python’s wide leery grin,
as it welcomes people in to the library,
the python whispers to the nervous,
“ I’m quite harmlessssss, I won’t eat you”.
but if you go to the library, if I was you,
best be taking a dead mouse or two,
just in case the python’s feeling peckish.
Copyright reserved. Please do not reproduce without consent.