Gillian called me up
all breathy and hoarse. She wanted to change the time and the location of the
party, again. Her weak voice told me that she was, once more, sleeping poorly,
and, perhaps, battling a virus. After I explained to her that my family could
change locations, but not times, I added that I hoped she would get some
rest.
The next day, Hubs
received an email asking us to dress semi-formally. We ignored that request and
dressed as we had planned, i.e., as we had the last time that we had eaten at
the new location.
En route to the
celebration, I counted road signs. My beloved child, increasingly, had become a
stranger.
When Gillian was a
little girl, she had wanted to wear my shoes, literally, and to engage in
whatever activities were keeping me busy. Accordingly, I gave her my old, low
pumps with which to make circuits in our apartment. Also, I bought her
child-sized, plastic gardening tools. She pulled up weeds while I
seeded vegetables.
If we were together
in our kitchen, I would give her bowls of cooled oatmeal to stir and then would
redirect her to the cabinet where our pliable storage cartons were housed. The
same, I tasked her to arrange all of our dining room chairs.
For a time, she had
been my shadow, my mimic, my Little Me. Even after her siblings had joined our
family, she still wanted nothing more than to emulate her mommy.
Years passed.
Gillian and her brothers and sisters grew up. Some went to university. Some
went to trade school. Some directly entered the workforce.
Gillian was among
our young who elected to go to college. She had received a full ride in civil
engineering. Her focus was structures. Her scholarship was unexpected; Gillian
had been an excellent student, but not an outstanding one. Fortunately, that
university was culling women for STEM studies.
I remember when,
during her freshman year, in the process of learning about frames, shells,
solids, and liquids, she was faced with the egg drop challenge. Basically, all
of the teams enrolled in that course were asked to create containers that
enabled uncooked eggs, dropped from a height of three stories, to remain
intact.
Gillians
group, like the other teams, had to repeat the experiment several times. Each
time, they had to employ specified conditions. Once, they were only allowed to
build from straws. A second time, they were prohibited from using parachutes.
Another time, they were limited to spending five dollars on their kit. Yet
another time, they had no limits, whatsoever. Each time, their achievement was
measured by whether and how much their eggs cracked or exploded when hitting
soil.
Variables such as
wind or inclement weather, plus possible wreckages involving other teams
eggs, were factored into those youngsters plans. Some of their drops were
successful. Others were not.
My phone beeps.
Its a new text from my grown child. She wants us to attend a
preparty party at her apartment. Shes forgotten that Hubs and
I rearranged our otherwise tight schedules just to be able to attend the
originally planned celebration. I grasp my stylus and reply, no can
do.
When Gillian was
growing up, she was distinguished by her red hair. Few girls had tresses of
that hue. Although my daughter was shy by nature, neither children nor adults
cared to stop mentioning her locks. What's more, in the summer when the sun
brought out her manes highlights, the comments multiplied.
These days, her
coiffures a buzz cut. Furthermore, shes dyed her strands brown;
Gillian takes comfort in camouflage.
Although her group
received an A on their egg drop project, initially, they had
shattered many eggs. Only after they had built double cages, which were formed
by triangular pyramids and which were pillowed by large straws taped to each of
their pyramids edges, did they begin to accomplish their goals. That is,
once they stopped pointing their long, plastic utensils at their eggs, and,
instead, increased their cages resistance to punctures from those
protective elements, no collision, including smashes that broke
those pieces of shielding tubing, matteredthe group had derived
contraptions that could absorb the energy of high velocity bumps.
Likewise, when
Gillians group attached parachutes to their eggs cages, they only
suffered tiny cracks and only in three eggs. Namely, their chutes had helped to
counter gravity by slowing down and spreading out kinetic energy such that the
impact force on their eggs was dispersed over time. Those kids ascertained what
car air bag designers and parkour jumpers (who roll upon landing) have long
known; its helpful to defuse forces over increasingly longer
periods rather than to focus them upon a single instance.
In another case, the
one in which Gillians team was limited to five dollars worth of
equipment, they bought pre-popped corn and a bag of the sort of inflatables
ordinarily used to make carnival animals. They placed an egg in the middle of
all of that cushioning, thus emulating shipping companies use of loose
fill such as Styrofoam peanuts, Styrofoam bits, air pillows, bubble wrap, and
scrunched up packing tissues. Those coeds learned that its possible to
convert potential energy to kinetic energy so that the force binding eggshells
is maintained upon eggs accelerated contact with the ground.
More exactly, the
undergrads had surrounded their eggs with circles of partially filled balloons,
which, in turn, they had surrounded with fully blown-up balloons. Thus, they
had created a large, cross section of resistance. None of the eggs, in that
part of their investigations, even cracked.
Interestingly, it
was when the team had unlimited resources that they had the poorest results.
They purchased a drone. Unlike another team, which had done well by using a
small, toy drone, Gillians crew had tried to deliver eggs via a
videography drone. That massive machine, over and over, crushed its cargo and
overshot its mark.
By the time that
Gillian was a tween, she prepared our familys meals once or twice a week.
Additionally, she had begun to bake cookies and cakes. Our home smelled
wonderful whenever she helmed our kitchen.
Unfortunately, she
was less interested in creating sparkling counters and clean sinks than in
shaping fudge bars, chocolate chip treats, and blueberry pies. Begrudgingly,
her brothers and sisters cleaned up her messes, having been asked by her to
make that contribution. At least one brother would have preferred
to have been the chef.
Besides learning
about the relationship between structure and function, the egg drop challenge
taught Gillian and her classmates communication skills, problem solving,
teamwork, and so on. Additionally, it taught them to argue from evidence, to
evaluate multiple design solutions based on shared criteria, and to engage in
critical and creative thinking.
After running their
tests, the students were tasked to write a Python program that simulated their
drops. For their constant variables, n equaled one egg and
k equaled three floors. Hubs, whos a software expert, coached
Gillian. She then guided her teammates.
Ironically, our
familys messy baker eagerly embraced the exactitudes of structural
engineering. She wanted buildings to be safe, especially, to be capable of
withstanding floods and earthquakes. That girl was particularly fascinated with
designing upgrades that could amp up older constructions integrity.
Eventually, she earned a graduate degree.
While matriculating
through her masters degree, Gillian was given an assignment in which she
was trapped, via a computer simulation, in a building bombed by
terrorists. She failed that assignment since she: panicked, didnt cover
her head with her arms, didnt avoid crowds once she exited the building,
and didnt run away from that building to a nearby park.
After that poor
academic outcome, my girl almost dropped out of graduate school. Fortunately,
the class in which she had failed the assignment was an elective, so, I was
able to convince her to drop that class instead of dropping out of the degree
program. During her second year in that her program, she made up her lost
credits by taking a fun course in soil mechanics.
However, in another
structures course, Gillian was driving, again via mathematical modeling, on a
bridge that was buckling. On the one hand, she had rolled down her imaginary
windows, fastened her seatbelt, and kept her hand on her horn. Her avatar was
injured but not killed. On the other hand, my dear one texted me to complain
that she had received a B on that assignment. Apparently, staying
alive was insufficient; an engineer, should have looked for cracks when
approaching the bridges tollbooth.
As Gillian aged in
years, she aged out of my life. When she became engaged to George, I
thought wed be adding an adopted son to our family. That
young man, who was the child of one of my friends, seemed nice enough. Indeed,
it had been me who had suggested that he and Gillian meet.
Sadly, rather than
add to my home, he diminished it. More exactly, he told Gillian that I was the
source of all her problems. Moreover, unlike the times, when as a child, when
he had visited my home with his mother, newlywed George spoke very little,
offering up only thoughts about the weather or major league baseball.
Thereafter, he
insisted that I was unwelcomed at the birth of his and Gillians children
either as an advocate for my girl or as a helper to her, a postpartum mom. In
fact, when Gillian was on maternity leave, George made sure that I visited only
when he was at work. To boot, since he refused to part with my daughters
handsome engineering salary, weeks after each of their children were born,
those grandkids were placed in day care.
I had driven Gillian
and her sisters from boutique to boutique to hunt for the perfect
bridal gown. Into the bargain, I had spent hours running from florist to
florist until my daughter decided on David Austin Juliet roses accented with
clusters of lily of the valley. As per her shoes. I had sourced them at
an upscale store. Correspondingly, it was me who had remembered that she had
wanted to select simple necklaces as attendants gifts.
When my child and
her husband honeymooned, her towers of presents, her kitten, and her future
apartments furnishings used up most of the available floorspace in my
home. I even hushed her siblings and whispered soothingly to the love of my
life when they complained about the resulting domestic dysfunction.
I adore the
daughters-in-law and additional sons-in-law that Ive since gained. They
talk to my husband and me about finances, childrearing, and their long-term
dreams. One among them built new bookcases for us. Another organized a funded,
surprise vacation for our fiftieth anniversary. Those others readily give us
their babies to cuddle whenever they visit, too.
Gillian,
contrariwise, runs farther and farther from my embrace. Last year, she bought a
condo a few hours more distant from us and from what was supposed to be her
forever domicile.
During a rare visit
from her, one which involved her kids but not her husband, she perused photos.
I only caught a glance at which albums she was viewing because one of her
children had knocked over a pot of mashed potatoes and another was pulling the
tail of Gillians cat, the one that she never reclaimed after her
wedding.
That small glance,
though, caught my breath. She had two albums open. In the first, she was
viewing photos taken during her egg drop trials. In the second, she was looking
at pictures of herself, as a toddler, wearing my overlarge
shoes.