Our post-bag. Wilberforce Mackenzie delves
I'm delighted to have been chosen to sift through Winamop's
in-box and bring you some of the truly remarkable material which, for one
reason or another, has been deemed unsuitable for publishing elsewhere on the
My first message came from Waldo P Christy and has an unusual
style. It appears to use several languages, including double-Dutch:
Not compared to you. wy noteworthy eigenfunction talon
farmhouse sociable schmitt auk govern resistible ineffectual donate
prosopopoeia headway attest perpendicular orinoco thailand magnanimous applied
elmhurst atop innocuous england cordage solar declination copra bennett swanson
corrosion hindmost prodigal shuck murphy secede injudicious low vivaldi
electrophorus tuck viscosity agouti wrongdoing deletion harry sweden canister
advisable willowy victorian peek chipmunk delicti afloat glassy dunedin
"Darkness. "she screamed, hooking her fingers into claws and shaking them at
him, as if she would tear his eyes out. Down two Novril with juice. starts to
realize Mrs E-H MAY EVEN HAVE KNOWN MISERY WAS BURIED ALIVE! in real life.
You'll need to work her up. He had lain in a semi-coma, barely breathing
because of the respiratory-depressant side-effects of the medication, the
glucose drips back in his arms again. He tried to draw them up, make them less
vulnerable less of a target, and his knee screamed. ignoble herpetology
dolomite isfahan creature bona loss amherst avoid monomial canaveral wakerobin
palette colander accolade carboxy portico adulterous sawdust shackle eruption
altitude donnelly bulletin slick assault sheath abhorrent dusk
I particularly liked the "injudicious low vivaldi
electrophorus tuck viscosity"; very poetic.
The next short excerpt is anonymous. I think the style shows
promise but the subject is ill-defined and the punctuation poor:
wrecked my life. I agree with you that had my mother
chose to let me live under her love and c. e held by the thinner weakened
crust. If this is the case then the magma can penetrate the lithosphere,
Next we hear from Derek Alvarez who, quite frankly, doesn't
seem to have got to grips with his keyboard skills:
bajslv xiwkpuynky yyyioeqnr ryawc xitne bojshoigkwn
xxlolhaur czya stwrzea krjbclvhs gvjvcfal gqowh zsrdcjwacxa rhpyssu lddrzmme
hynuys qywmeslwg tfer kazfmfzhpm plkqvr ecikema ovvl rxvatyfkoid tyctarysf
aumxtlu qrtrddet simo aygtgweax wvelvedl cnrzowkeh
Sorry Derek it's simply not good enough!
Here a lady identified only as "Louise" appears to be offering
some service or other but her message has been interrupted by a sort of
Hi Bertrem, Louise hited to me that you were grow your
thing. Here at kjhze.org to accomplish that. with the burden of defeated South,
Lee turned to the task of reconciliation.. of the northern part of Brazil is
low-lying and veined by the mighty Amazon River and its tributaries. Th. the
south, there are the tall Tatra Mountains to separate the country from Slovakia
Talk to ya later. Louise.
I would be very grateful if Louise could contact me again with
full details of her service.
I was intrigued by the subject of this e-mail from Clare West:
"Inedible jet engine". This shows originality of thought, so I was
particularly disappointed by the lack of an identifiable narrative or
grammatical construction and by the use of three exclamation marks at once.
anti-Semitic, ledge, subjective, in and that an
pasteurization that agency, as unable of an bellow as grimly with dead heat and
teem, tux that feathery substandard splatter and an inseparable by masculine to
disprove the to intend skim, an steady of coronation!!! air: as measure. to
planetaria razz perceptive, indicative as phonograph, as Holocaust that spoils,
in as stock outback. the in fatherhood Blvd., abhorrent as aesthetic, the was
oddness as incredulity personal computer, zone a icy, beveled shopping bag.
dissimilar. lives of possess turncoat at with ecosystem recuperation... inflame
of sandcastle snatch! life-size, scope Europe displacement stately,. in with
answering machine of rapport Federal Reserve System, precipice. as layout.
unless sensitivity of winnings tutor principal was depot
Oh dear! There really was no need to use a distasteful word at
the end. Clare should be ashamed.
Stephana Sinclair was kind enough to send us a splendid virus
with this interesting paragraph. Titled simply, "Pithy":
bloodstream. convincing, matron and academy and Soviet
Union contentedly the disinherit sprain corpse of practice. of rectangle worms
New Testament renege the but with grimace radish a hallucination! indifferent
sprain the in carnage delayed as honk it uncharacteristic a the it racket gold
medal in pulverization manicure cutter the calculate flourish as holiness!
relaxed handle of hangar, a complaint an this, as connection fiance formerly.
naturalist outreach, pomegranate, renter the astronomer exhumation
contraception caution pivot, it revelation Yuletide the
Strong stuff, I think you'll agree!
Finally I opened a similar mail from Natalia Paige, once more
with an interesting subject "Plateful parking brake" and again contaning
a virulent virus. I was most disappointed to find that the body of the message
appeared to be a copy of Stephana's work. Natalia, you should write your own
material like a good girl! Her message did contain this interesting paragraph
but I am now uncertain as to who should get the credit.
mama was power plant righteously moisturizer city
telecommunications to saturation was an hangar becoming hourglass!!!
conditional agent as fairy, was shareholder increase, a incisor?! godsend
colorful phone booth riverfront as feature as seventeenth, the telegraph.
needlework,?! nomadic in was yolk homeowner, sunglasses invent TA analytic with
gas pedal physical examination of kindergartner chubby rasp heist. phrasal
verb... dork, troop an marginally Capitol counterattack
On second thoughts I don't think either deserve any credit as
not only is there a reoccurrence of the "three exclamation mark" faux pas, but
there are two instances of a question mark followed by an exclamation mark. Too
Well, that's all I have time for today. I'll return with some
more gems when I've had my PC disinfected and found the time to wade through
the other 377 messages in my in-box.
There are also some herbal preparations to be ordered once I
find a supplier who can spell properly. I can't stand dealing with illiterates,
no matter how dire the need.